Tammy is among the 27% of the population who believes there is a secret cure for cancer that is being covered up by the pharmaceutical industry. She thinks this study proves that she is not crazy for believing this, but actually, this story only proves that 27% of the population is as crazy or crazier than Tammy, and that is scary. Tammy is probably even more crazy than the 27%, because she also believes the government is in on the cover up since they make mucho casho in the sale and existence of cancer drugs, and cancer helps keep the population under control, which is also good for the government. Yes, she believes there is a population control conspiracy too. Yikes. That looks even crazier in print than it sounded in my mind. Send me a dollar.

Tammy despises Tom Cruise and all talk of Tom Cruise. That's why I had to hide my "Tom Cruise Kills Oprah" link in a little Easter Egg on my last post so she wouldn't see it and beat me. Lucky for me, The People went looking for houses this morning, and I was able to watch Matt Lauer interview Tom Cruise on "The Today" show. Don't get me wrong, I don't actually like Tom Cruise either. I am just studying his ways. I am intrigued by this over-hyped moron, and I want to learn how to manipulate the masses into showering me with things like butt rubbings and pears the way he does. Well, he is getting other things than butt rubbings and pears (probably), but I have little use for such things.

I took a personality test, and here is how I faired:

99 EXTRAVERSION - Your score on Extraversion is high, indicating you are sociable, outgoing, energetic, and lively. You prefer to be around people much of the time.
99 Friendliness
99 Gregariousness
99 Assertiveness
84 Activity Level
95 Excitement-Seeking
96 Cheerfulness

1 AGREEABLENESS - Your score on Agreeableness is low, indicating less concern with others' needs than with your own. People see you as tough, critical, and uncompromising.
78 Trust
1 Morality
8 Altruism
1 Cooperation
0 Modesty
8 Sympathy

0 CONSCIENTIOUSNESS - Your score on Conscientiousness is low, indicating you like to live for the moment and do what feels good now. Your work tends to be careless and disorganized.
27 Self-Efficacy
7 Orderliness
1 Dutifulness
28 Achievement-Striving
36 Self-Discipline
0 Cautiousness

42 NEUROTICISM - Your score on Neuroticism is average, indicating that your level of emotional reactivity is typical of the general population. Stressful and frustrating situations are somewhat upsetting to you, but you are generally able to get over these feelings and cope with these situations.
1 Anxiety
96 Anger
17 Depression
4 Self-Consciousness
73 Immoderation
86 Vulnerability

18 OPENNESS TO EXPERIENCE - Your score on Openness to Experience is low, indicating you like to think in plain and simple terms. Others describe you as down-to-earth, practical, and conservative.
70 Imagination
5 Artistic Interests
47 Emotionality
12 Adventurousness
0 Intellect
63 Liberalism

Nothing really shocking to me in the results. Yeah, I love to play, play, play! If you get in my way, I'll steamroll you, you hoser!

Sometimes lions don't eat people, but they always eat Pugs.

Now this is what I'm talking about. King Mswati III just took his 12th wife a couple weeks after his 11th. I have only two ladies in my life (The Lady Pugs), but still they give me flack for not being the only lady. OK, so they are seesters, and they are slippers, but still - there aren't 12 of them! And, I have the courtesy to keep them separate from each other, although I suspect they talk about me when I'm not around. Here I am with Paprika and her Seester. Yeah, her name is just "Seester." They're twins, so how could I ever be expected to choose between them?

Sometimes people just don't know when to keep their mouths shut. Take for example, Dakota Brown, a Middle School kid who is expected to know how to convert decimals back to fractions by hand. So, this kid accidentally figures out that you can do this conversion using the TI calculator which was supposed to have had this functionality disabled. Does the kid keep his mouth shut and use this to his own advantage or perhaps sell his knowledge to the less mathematically inclined kids for many legos and/or oreos? No, he blabs about it, and now it's front page news on CNN. As a result, not only did TI recall the calculators, but they issued new ones in a different color so Teachers can easily recognize and confiscate the old ones. If I were human and went to school with this little dude, he and I would have some words, because Pugness knows I would be one of the mathematically challenged kids. Now they're holding a "low-key" ceremony to honor him. For what? For pushing random keys on the calculator? The U.S. has low standards for child intelligence. I am, however, comforted in knowing that his special little shin dig will be followed by wedgies, noogies, and dunks in the toilet lovingly known as swirlies. Kids invent the cruelest forms of torture... Now there's a kid who deserves a special ceremony - the kids who invented the wedgie.

Picture book - Picture of your Pugger, taken by his Mother, a long time ago ... Check me out. I'm that dude from that HP commercial!

The weekend at Mr. Chris's house was fun, sort of. The People left The Chewb and I locked up all day in the kitchen on Saturday and Sunday, which sucked, and then played World of Warcraft when they got home at night, which also sucked. But, Tammy had to clean up The Chewb's dookie twice, once while it was still warm, and that is funny. She gagged a lot which made it even funnier. The Chewb's a hoot.

This is how I roll. Can you believe The People transport me in a cage like a wild animal in transit to the zoo? I'm too cute for this lifestyle. Keep your fingers out of my cage when we're on the road though, because I might bite them off like little hot dogs! I guess being caged turns me a tad feral.

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