10-31-03
Happy Halloween! And to all you weirdos who insist on dressing up your dog, please at least keep the costume consistent with your dog's sexual orientation. For example, don't dress Brutus up like a ballerina. I don't know Brutus, but I bet he likes the ladies.

I was casually rooting through a box sitting on the floor yesterday, and I found the coolest thing! It is this green stuffed thing wearing a cape and a crown! It is too cool. So I stood there and whined at it, because I wanted it really bad, but I knew if I just grabbed it I would get a spankin'. Of course Tammy thought it was so cute of me to ask before taking, so she let me have it. Apparently its name is Froggie! I am going to rip the heck out of that thing!!

Oh yeah, and Tammy stepped in poop outside while wearing her slippers. That was pretty cool too.

10-29-03
It was CUH-OLD out last night! So the people went to the store and got some of those cheater fire logs, and we are gonna be toasty tonight! I can't wait to warm my butt in front of the fire with some Irish coffee! OK, so I probably won't get any of the Irish coffee, but I am hopeful. Hey, it could happen! Like, if I spill it or Tammy looks away or something ...

The people applied to some more of those Art show things this week. That is not good news for the Pug, because that means more time in the darkroom. I hate that darkroom, and I don't even get anything out of the Art show! I think maybe I will start being bad in the darkroom.

10-27-03
The people and I were playing tag team tickle this weekend. Ian would tickle Tammy, then tag me in and I would tickle her, then I would tag him in and he would tickle her again. It was a lot of fun. I think Ian and I won.

10-24-03
Ian unexpectedly came home today at lunch time, and I was outside doing my business, and he scared the heck out of me! Then he kept making fun of the face I made when I was scared. It was pretty rude, but at least I was getting all the attention, and that's the most important thing to a Pug!

Halloween is coming soon. I wonder if the people will make me dress up again this year. Last year we went to the Pet Smart for a costume contest, and I lost. I was wearing my dinosaur sweater that Tammy knitted for me, and I'm sure the judges thought Tammy bought it, because it is so well made, even though it makes me look like a gay dog. Chewbie has a matching one, but she has since "grown" out of it. I don't like playing dress up, because it isn't fetch, but as long as I don't have to wear the pink poncho, I will try to have a good time. I hate that poncho. One day I will find it when the people aren't looking, and I will mail it to some 3rd world nation that will appreciate it. I better put enough postage on the package though, because I definitely DON'T want it to get returned!!

10-23-03
Ian did not put out the mouse poison last night, so I am still here today.

My Pomeranian friend, Chewbie, that I blog about is not actually named Chewbie. Her name is actually Trouble, but one of Chris's roommates (Flyin' Bryan) called her Chewbie so much that it just kind of stuck, and now that is her unofficial name. I am afraid that might happen to me too. Tammy has a lot of knicknames for me, but the one that she has been using most consistently for the longest amount of time is Diddle Bear. Yes, Diddle Bear. I did not mis-type it. I feel like George on Seinfeld when he wanted his knickname to be T-Bone, but it ended up being Cocoa. I don't want to be Diddle Bear! I want to be T-Bone or something manly!! Hopefully she'll grow out of this one like she did Pickle Head. What a weird-o.

10-22-03
The mouse in our house is eating my food. I like to take my time when I eat, but now I have to devour it as soon as it hits the floor, or the mouse will get it. Ian is apparently bringing home some water activated rat poison, but Tammy is really worried that the mouse is an evil genius and will somehow feed it to me. I am also secretly afraid of that, because I cannot resist eating things off the ground. If I don't update this blog again, it is because I am in Pug Heaven, even though Ian claims that place doesn't exist.

10-20-03
The peoples' first Art Show is finally over, and it seems that things went well for them. Tammy was doing some kind of butt-shaking "happy" dance which is usually a celebratory dance, so I am assuming they made some of that money stuff they mention everytime I "destroy" something. Tammy came home smelling like many different types of dogs which really ticks me off, because I was told that dogs were not allowed at the show. Tammy is, however, a stickler for rules, so I will just have to believe her and assume other people were breaking the rules.

Chris, Chewbie and I had a fun time this weekend. Chewbie had the ilk, so we didn't get to play as much as I would like due to her vomitting often. Tammy took the vomitting surprisingly well, even though the "expensive" rug was often the victim. Chris and Chewbie left in the middle of the night and did not "put me away", so I was left to roam the house while the people were sleeping. This was not the great experience I have always imagined it to be. I got scared and barked for Tammy to "put me away." We have a mouse running loose in our house. It could be rabid, and although I am up to date on my rabies shot, I don't want to take the chance of an altercation with a wild animal.

10-16-03
The people and I saw a new commercial on TV for some asthma medicine or something, and the entire thing was centered around a Pug, and an unattractive Pug at that. I should have been in that commercial, because I am SO much better looking than any Pug I have seen on TV - including that Men in Black one and the one for the make-up commercial! Ian suggested that only the ugly Pugs are trainable, because they have nothing else going for them. Perhaps he is correct. I know I don't listen to anything I am told to do, because I am cute, and Tammy lets me get away with everything! One look at my cute whittle face, and she melts. Har-har-har! That is my villain laugh... But seriously, if there are any doggie talent scouts out there, send me an email, because I am the Pug you are looking for! By the way, I do respond to orders when enticed with a slice of Pear - sweet, succulent pear ...

10-15-03
While I was talking with Miss. Maggie this weekend, I was surprised to find that she does not have a theme song. This got me thinking, and I realized that none of my dog friends have their own theme songs. This is strange, because I, unlike other dogs, do have a theme song. Let me share it with you. It is set to the tune of the Indiana Jones theme song. It goes like this, "Good Boy Norman, Good Boy Pug... Good Boy Norman, Good Boy Pug Pug Pug... Good Boy Norman... Good Boy Pug... " and then the end of the song with the really strong duh-duh-duh's. It keeps going until Tammy gets tired of singing it or Ian requests that she stops. I have dreams about this song where I am swinging from vines and being chased by big boulders and saving pretty ladies. Those are some cool dreams. I recommend that all dogs' people should give them a theme song, even if it is a rip-off of a popular movie.

I see that Chris's website says he is Mobile bound this weekend. I hope Chewbie comes too! I need some Pom lovin'. If she does come with him, I hope he keeps the car windows rolled up the whole time! She jumped out of the car one time and rolled-rolled-rolled-rolled-rolled down the road! Luckily, she is "fluffier" than your average Pomeranian and was not injured. She has a thin candy shell. Or maybe it's a butter shell, I'm not sure.

10-14-03
Maggie's people picked her up last night. We had a nice visit, but it was much more low-energy than when I stayed at her house. She really missed her people, especially the little one, Wilson. He is definitely a cute little guy, but I wouldn't let his absence get me down like that. We played a little bit, but she mostly just moped around the house. The people referred to her as "the good dog." Tammy even gave her good boy bones which was really confusing, because she is a girl! She isn't even that good of a dog anyway! She chews up paper and steals Tammy's socks! I don't do either of those bad things! And you should see the piles she left in the yard. I won't elaborate on piles of what, but I think you get my drift - no pun intended.

This weekend the people set up their Art Show tent, and I made a point of sitting quietly out of the way in a corner and being a super good boy so they could see that I deserve to go with them. Ian, however, could see through my plan and forbade even the thought of me attending. Another plot foiled by the Mean One!

Tammy was sick yesterday and did not go to work. She slept all day with me. I even got to sleep in the bed. We spooned. It was pleasant.

10-09-03
Last night I got me a little taste of spaghetti sauce. The people do not give me "people food," because they claim it is bad for me. I don't know why it is not bad for them, but that is their excuse. So last night I dropped my toy in Tammy's dish of pasta, knowing that she would be too lazy to get up and wash the toy off. And of course I was right, because she let me lick the spaghetti sauce off the toy! It was good stuff.

I have decided that I am not a Southern dog. I am more of a mountain dog. Hopefully the people will realize that soon and get me out of this pressure cooker climate.

10-08-03
I think I overheard that a certain red-haired Lab is going to be staying at my house this weekend. I am glad I just got a bath, because I want to look my best for Miss. Maggie Winter! She is a mega-hottie. I don't get many canine visitors at the house now that Chewbie and Mr. Chris moved to Buuuuu-ford. The extra "u's" are for the heaving sound you have to make when you pronounce Buford. It's difficult to illustrate in print. Anyway, I am so excited, because it is Fall now, and Miss. Maggie and I can run around the yard all day long without having to worry about me overheating! Hooray! Miss. Maggie is the only dog who has ever out-played me, and I think it was just because it was hot outside. We will see who is the play-a-holic this time! If only Chewbie were here, my life would be perfect...

10-06-03
Hey all you Pug lovers out there, I got a bath this weekend at the Pet Smart, and I am looking (and smelling) fine! Allie's sister kept telling me to stay away from her because I was stinky last week. I wish she was here now, because I would shamelessly puggle the mess out of her! While at the Pet Smart, I met a sexy lady Pug named Abbie. Her owner is interested in breeding her and is going to give me a ring when she is ready. I have no idea what that means, but I like how it sounds! I'm a ladies' Pug!!


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